Funny that this should be published today when we were just discussing this last night.
Really fascinating experiment.
http://www.bustle.com/articles/91389-if-jane-austens-leading-ladies-tried-okcupid-i-set-up-profiles-for-marianne-lizzie-catherine-and
Thought I'd share my friend's Ok Stupid parody:
ReplyDelete“We blush for the conduct of those, who behave themselves foolishly before us; and that tho’ they shew no sense of shame, nor seem in the least conscious of their folly.”
(David Hume, A Treatise of Human Nature, 371)
DoomedProspectiveSuitor#2756
32 Los Angeles, CA (11 miles) Man
Self summary
I’m all about working hard and playing hard. I’m all about checking things off my list and feeling good about my accomplishments. I’m finally ready to let that someone special out there discover me. I’m an irreverent maverick and I’m looking for a fellow traveler on this journey we call life.
What I’m doing with my life
Running a couple of start-ups. Living the dream. Being authentic. Hiking. Helping the disabled whether they want my help or not.
I’m really good at
Never giving up.
Telling it like it is.
Life hacking.
Living life on my own terms and creating my own destiny.
Surrounding myself with similarly driven individuals so as to maximize my potential.
Favorite books The Celestine Prophecy.
Favorite movies
The Notebook.
A Beautiful Mind.
Any biopic, really
Anything directed by Ron Howard.
Favorite shows. TV: I’m a cable news junkie. Concerts: you’ll always find me at a Dave Matthews show. I’ve seen him, like, five times. Art: I love art from other cultures. I went to the Louvre in Paris. That was a great show.
Favorite music World music. Doesn’t matter where it’s from as long it’s from the World.
Favorite food I’m strictly vegan but other than that I’ll eat anything as long as it’s ethnic. I’m known for my spectacular curries. The secret is more turmeric. Always. More. Turmeric. Tastes slightly bitter but has amazing ayurvedic healing properties.
First things people notice about me
My intense stare. Some women say it’s creepy but they’re wrong.
My relentless positivity.
6 things I could never do without
air
children; they are our future
love
hiking
meditation
hiking
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How much I am evolving as a human being every day.
The Dalai Lama. That dude has his shit together.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I cry during sex. Always.
You should message me if
You have your shit together.
You’re an “it” getter. [1]
Notes
[1] These are both real statements that I’ve seen under the “you should message me” tab of men’s profiles. Another, different, guy wrote me with the opener, “you seem like you have your shit together.” I really wanted to reply saying, “Sir, I assure you that nothing could be further from the truth. My shit is flying, messily, in all directions.” But I didn’t. It was another guy who wrote me who has the you-should-message-me if “you’re an ‘it’ getter” line.
I don’t get it. So I didn’t write him back.
More generally, I’ll admit to some fabrications in this profile (I haven’t read anyone ‘fess up to “helping the disabled whether they want my help or not,” to crying during sex, or to their relentless positivity); but there’s a lot that’s not made up, including The Celestine Prophecy, life hacking, Dave Matthews, the Dalai Lama, and pretty much every single cliché you can think of including “living the dream,” and “being authentic.” Oh, and hiking. So much bloody hiking.
"My shit is flying, messily, in all directions.” --Perfection.
ReplyDeleteI would send Catherine Morland a message on OkCupid, but somehow wind up having an unpleasant evening with Isabella instead.
ReplyDeleteKind of sad that she didn't even try to write up a profile for poor Fanny Price. That would be a tough one.
ReplyDelete